


Focus

by Bingo Bramble (VodkaAndMaple)



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Iron Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, brief mention of drug use but nothing explicit, same for drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 01:27:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3510020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VodkaAndMaple/pseuds/Bingo%20Bramble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Noun) the centre of interest or actvity<br/>(Verb) pay particular attention to</p>
<p>Tony has always had trouble staying focused; a short exploration.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Focus

**Author's Note:**

> This short little baby was born at 2am as a way to legitimise staying awake when I knew I had Uni early that same morning. I missed the classes anyway. Woops.
> 
> Still, Tony is my fave and totally worth it. Wish it was longer but ah well.

# Focus

##### (Noun) The centre of interest or activity

##### (Verb) Pay particular attention to

There is a fact about Tony Stark that nobody knows. Perhaps they’ve mentioned it now and again, or they’ve thought it in exasperation. It has never, however, taken hold as a statement of fact. It is not said in the same lines of; ‘the sky is blue’ and ‘the grass is green’.

There is a fact about Tony Stark that nobody _who is alive knows_. It was in his early years, years that he will jokingly grumble are too far away, that the fact _became_ a fact.

Tony has always been a genius; that is a fact. His father may have never been around often (too busy chasing after a dream, and Tony sometimes secretly hates Steve for that) but he had always been an observant man. What he observed was his son’s complete lack of focus.

Distraction takes hold easily in any child, but Tony could hardly focus long enough to eat his lunch, or write a sentence. The genius of his mind was in danger from the mere fact that Tony Stark could not keep focused.

Growing up, Tony has had to struggle to focus _all the time_. He finds it difficult to do things that are ordinary and second-hand to others. He finds that people simply refuse to understand his predicament. He finds that he is labelled as flighty, arrogant, and childish; all because of something he can’t control.

There is a reason that Tony has had trouble with drink for a long time. It is one of the only times that he feels normal; the drink solidifies things for him. The drink will let him focus on the positively mundane things in life, and that gives him _so much fucking joy_. And if in some moments he loses all focus and the world spins and twirls, then it is normality still; it happens all the time to others who drink.

All Tony Stark has ever wanted from life is to be normal and accepted. He cannot focus and is an outcast because people just don’t understand. There are times he will wake from a dream, a sharpness in his chest when he breathes in, and try so very hard not to cry because the dream world is so much more accepting of what he is.

The only other thing that keeps his focus is his work. The first robot he built was as a child. It hugged him and asked him how he was, but most of all it _kept his focus_. The entire time he was planning and building the robot he was focused. Nothing else distracted him, and it was such a wonderful, wonderful feeling A thousand times better than the drugs he tried years later.

This has continued through to his adult life. Sometimes he hates it. It is simply another reason of why he cannot fit into normality. There is only one Tony Stark in the world and he is a genius who will change it but-- He is treated differently because of something he cannot live without, and he hates that.

Other times he loves it. He can finally focus. His mind has stopped bashing and flinging around a million thoughts; each more exhausting than the last. There is a clarity that is an addiction to him. He is completely calm and only needs to think of one thing at a time. Nothing else matters, and that makes him so desperately, _terribly_ happy.


End file.
